Review: EVERY VARIABLE OF US by Charles A. Bush

 

Every Variable of Us by Charles A. Bush
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

After Philly teenager Alexis Duncan is injured in a gang shooting, her dreams of a college scholarship and pro basketball career vanish in an instant. To avoid becoming another Black teen trapped in her poverty-stricken neighborhood, she shifts her focus to the school's STEM team, a group of nerds seeking their own college scholarships. Academics have never been her thing, but Alexis is freshly motivated by Aamani Chakrabarti, the new Indian student who becomes her mentor (and crush?). Alexis begins to see herself as so much more than an athlete. But just as her future starts to reform, Alexis’s own doubts and old loyalties pull her back into harm’s way.

— 

This book and these characters are going to stay with me for a long, long time. After reading Every Variable of Us, Charles A. Bush is now an auto-buy author for me.

This story is so many things: it’s about loss and grief, it’s about abuse and survival, it’s about resilience and adapting to not-so-great circumstances. It’s about gangs and relationships. It’s about fears of what the future holds. It’s about family and the people we hold dear. And it says a lot about race too.

Lex is a seventeen-year-old Black girl who’s caught up in a drive by shooting and shot, ending her basketball career. She’s angry and desperate, and so flawed—but understandable and relatable. Her friends are mostly in the ‘gang culture’ and she thought basketball was her way out of the town. After the shooting, she feels she has nothing. Until new student Aamani introduces her to the STEM team and Lex becomes the final After Philly teenager Alexis Duncan is injured in a gang shooting, her dreams of a college scholarship and pro basketball career vanish in an instant. To avoid becoming another Black teen trapped in her poverty-stricken neighborhood, she shifts her focus to the school's STEM team, a group of nerds seeking their own college scholarships. Academics have never been her thing, but Alexis is freshly motivated by Aamani Chakrabarti, the new Indian student who becomes her mentor (and crush?). Alexis begins to see herself as so much more than an athlete. But just as her future starts to reform, Alexis’s own doubts and old loyalties pull her back into harm’s way member of the team, meaning they qualify for competitions.

The character arc for Lex is phenomenal. She goes from looking down on ‘nerds’ to wanting to study and really cares for her STEM teammates. She goes from nearly failing school to improving her GPA by two points, and she finds her own family among new friends. She struggles to navigate her new life as disabled and the effects this has on her career, future, and self-esteem. She wrestles with her sexuality, afraid of being Black and queer, but eventually choosing to embrace her feelings for Aaamani. She examines how much of her fears and beliefs about not being straight are rooted in ideology and her need to minimise the target on her.

Representation in this book is phenomenal. We’ve got Black characters, Asian characters, disabled characters, and neurodivergent characters. We examine white privilege and straight privilege, and we also look at drug addiction and poverty.

Lex’s mother is an addict and her mother’s boyfriend is abusive. Lex has been in multiple foster homes, at least one of which was also abusive. She’s beaten in this book and moves to a ‘crackhouse’ for safety—but she finds people who care for her and are in a position to look after at the end.

Because Lex undergoes such a strong character transformation, there’s very much her old life vs her new. Her former best friend Britt is deeply embedded in the old life—stealing, dealing drugs, living in an abusive foster home, trying to outwit other gangs—and we see her trying to pull Lex back into this life. These moments really are agonising to read. I was begging Lex to not go back to that, to stay with the STEM team, but of course, she didn’t. It was heartbreaking. And especially when Britt is then killed. I did not see that coming, but really I should have because it was inevitable.

And when Britt is murdered, Lex feels she has no choice but to avenge her—something that Aamani gets roped into when trying to stop her. I could not read fast enough here. So powerful and heartbreaking.

Aamani herself is also a great character. She’s Hindu and experiences racism, especially when other characters think she’s Muslim. In the story, she comes out as lesbian first to Lex and then to her parents—and her parents don’t accept it at all. We see Aamani struggling with this and the marriage her parents arrange for her, all the while trying to be Lex’s STEM tutor.

Matthew is on the STEM team and he’s Autistic. There’s an Author’s Note at the start of this book about this representation, emphasising it’s not own-voices autism rep. I loved Matthew’s character and Lex’s friendship with him, but I have seen a few autistic reviewers saying his character is a little stereotypical in places.

Lindsay is also another STEM team member, and Lex doesn’t get on with her at all at first, viewing her as a privileged white girl. Lindsay does seem cold and quite against Lex most of the time, but when we see her family it makes sense. She lives with parents who verbally (and maybe physically?) abuse each other. They have little money and live in a very dangerous neighbourhood. Lindsay is worn out and emotionally exhausted. Her collected, cold persona at school is a facade, and Lex acknowledges that she’s impressed that Lindsay has survived where she’s living.

And the love story. It’s a slow-build f/f between Lex and Aamani, and it challenges a lot of Lex’s misconceptions and her own stereotypes. Lex comes out as bisexual toward the end, as her relationship with Aamani has given her the courage to do this.

There is just so much packed into this story, and I wasn’t expecting it.

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Review: BEFORE WE WERE BLUE by E.J. Schwartz

 

Before We Were Blue by E.J. Schwartz
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Get healthy on their own—or stay sick together?

At Recovery and Relief, a treatment center for girls with eating disorders, the first thing Shoshana Winnick does is attach herself to vibrant but troubled Rowan Parish. Shoshana—a cheerleader on a hit reality TV show—was admitted for starving herself to ensure her growth spurt didn’t ruin her infamous tumbling skills. Rowan, on the other hand, has known anorexia her entire life, thanks to her mother’s “chew and spit” guidance. Through the drudgery and drama of treatment life, Shoshana and Rowan develop a fierce intimacy—and for Rowan, a budding infatuation, that neither girl expects.

As “Gray Girls,” patients in the center’s Gray plan, Shoshana and Rowan are constantly under the nurses’ watchful eyes. They dream of being Blue, when they will enjoy more freedom and the knowledge that their days at the center are numbered. But going home means separating and returning to all the challenges they left behind. The closer Shoshana and Rowan become, the more they cling to each other—and their destructive patterns. Ultimately, the girls will have to choose: their recovery or their relationship.

-- 

This book has everything I could possibly want. I love sad and haunting stories that also offer hope, and BEFORE WE WERE BLUE, E. J. Schwartz's debut, gives just that.

I requested an ARC of this book on NetGalley because the cover was just so beautiful. Then I started reading it and realised it was about eating disorders--and I was drawn right in. In fact, I fell in love with this story as soon as I started it. Chapter one gives us Shoshana's POV as she's in RR, a recovery programme for her eating disorder. Immediately, I was pulled into her world and her life. She felt so, so real, and the writing was beautiful. There's something so compelling about the writing, in fact, that I just couldn't put it down. I knew immediately that this was a five-star book for me--and then I got Rowan's POV. And, just, wow. I didn't think this book could get it better, but chapter two just lifted it beyond 5 stars. We'd already met Rowan from Shoshana's POV, but chapter two, written in direct address from Rowan to Shoshana reveals the one-sided nature and complex intricacies of their friendship. There's this hard, toxic edge to Rowan and we realise she's using Shoshana. My heart was pounding reading this. It's just deliciously addictive.

Schwartz is a master of characterisation and voice, and I wasn't prepared for just how good this book was going to be. Every chapter, as I got deeper into the story, made me fall even more for this book. Shoshana and Rowan feel so real. I was breathing their stories, and Schwartz covers a lot of ground in this book.

Both girls are suffering from eating disorders, and there's a lot of discourse on bodies and social media. Shoshana is a professional cheerleader who developed her ED as a response to the pressures of this (and a pretty nasty coach), while Rowan has had her ED for longer, likely having, in some part, 'inherited' the behaviours from her mother who also showed signs of this. This book also really looks into the psychology of eating disorders and how they're often linked to other conditions--not just the physical ones caused by the effects of starvation and malnutrition, but other mental illnesses too. And it looks at WHY eating disorders can occur and how and why someone can relapse during/after treatment. There's one line from Shoshana that particularly struck me--she says about how she just wanted to be gone, and this jus really got to me. It resonated with me, and I think so many people think that eating disorders are just about food and body image, and someone's mental torture and desperation to disappear can often be overlooked because of this.

The friendship between Rowan and Shoshana is masterfully written. Rowan's arc in particular is impressive--she starts off wanting to hold onto her status as 'gray' (those whose EDs are controlling them more), and she's proud of it. She wants to be disciplined and seen as disciplined enough to maintain her status as gray (again, these were things I could personally relate to). But we see Rowan's mindset changing as she decides she wants to get better--and this coincides with her realisation about how she's been using Shoshana and needs to be a better friend.

Rowan's arc cleverly contrasts with Shoshana's. When Rowan's resisting progress at the start of the book, Shoshana is making it. When Rowan makes progress at the end, Shoshana's hitting 'rock bottom' again (perhaps, worse than before). But

This is definitely a story of friendship too--in all its different types--and we see how close and dependent the two narrators are on each other. There was this super intense relationship between them that I just adored. Now, I must just mention here that I am ace, and a lot of things that Shoshana said had me getting strong ace vibes. But I kept thinking that it wouldn't got that way, that it was just a coincidence--and then the author confirmed that this was in fact ace rep! At that point, I hadn't thought I could love this book any more, but I really did. This was just...amazing. A book that I could personally relate to not just on the eating disorder rep but also the ace rep. I was speechless. I almost couldn't believe I'd found such a perfect book for me.

I was so sad when I finished this book. I'd felt so seen in these pages, and I just wanted it to continue.

E.J. Schwartz is now an auto-buy author for me. BEFORE WE WERE BLUE is a complex look at eating disorders, friendship, social media and societal pressures, the process of healing, and asexuality. It's masterfully written, compelling and powerful, and I could not turn the pages fast enough.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the ARC copy.

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Review: BRIGHT BURNING STARS by A.K. Small

 

Bright Burning Stars by A.K. Small
My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Best friends Marine Duval and Kate Sanders have trained at the Paris Opera Ballet School since childhood, where they’ve formed an inseparable bond forged by respective family tragedies and a fierce love for dance. When the body of a student is found in the dorms just before the start of their final year, Marine and Kate begin to ask themselves what they would do to win the ultimate prize: to be the one girl selected to join the Opera’s prestigious corps de ballet. Would they die? Cheat? Seduce the most talented boy in the school, dubbed the Demigod, hoping his magic would make them shine, too? Neither girl is sure.

But then Kate gets closer to the Demigod, even as Marine has begun to capture his heart. And as selection day draws near, the competition—for the prize, for the Demigod—becomes fiercer, and Marine and Kate realize they have everything to lose, including each other.

---

4.5 stars.

What can I say? I've picked up yet another novel about ballet dancers!

I've actually been waiting over a year for this book, and when my paperback preorder finally arrived, I was so excited to start it.

It follows two ballet dancers, Marine and Kate, as they finish their final year of ballet school and compete for a prestigious role as a professional dancer. We see their friendship tested as both strive to achieve the attentions of the best male dancer there, Cyrille, who is nicknamed "The Demigod." I must admit, I found that name annoying, especially how the nickname is used so frequently in the text.

The romance is heavier in this book than I was expecting, but it works. And we see the lengths that people will go to to get what they want. Hello, toxic competitive ballet dancers! This has to be one of my favourite things.

Oh and Marine's grieving for her brother who died several years ago too.

There are quite a lot of content warnings for this book though: sex, abortion, drugs, mental health, eating disorders, suicide, sucide attempts, grief, death. There really is so much wrapped up in these pages.

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Review: TOFFEE by Sarah Crossan

 

Toffee by Sarah Crossan
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

The astonishing new novel from the incomparable, multi-award-winning and Laureate, Sarah Crossan.

I am not who I say I am,
and Marla isn't who she thinks she is.

I am a girl trying to forget.
She is a woman trying to remember.

Allison has run away from home, and with nowhere to live, finds herself hiding out in the shed of what she thinks is an abandoned house. But the house isn't empty. An elderly woman named Marla, with dementia, lives there – and she mistakes Allison for an old friend from her past called Toffee.

Allison is used to hiding who she really is, and trying to be what other people want her to be. And so, Toffee is who she becomes. After all, it means she has a place to stay. There are worse places she could be.

But as their bond grows, and Allison discovers how much Marla needs a real friend, she begins to ask herself - where is home? What is a family? And most importantly, who am I, really?

----

This novel-in-verse has to be one of the most beautiful and heartbreaking books I've read. The depiction of dementia in it is so truthful and real, and I felt raw reading this book. Several times, it had me crying. It's just so, so real.

And that wasn't the only 'truth' in this book--it spoke a lot about abusive parents and domestic violence, and this just felt like so, so real too. Like, I could feel Allison's pain, and I loved how Crossan still showed how Allison did love her dad, that there were good moments between them, despite how he was abusive toward her.

This book covers a lot of difficult topics: Allison's mother died giving birth to her and her father emotionally neglected her as a child, which only got worse as she got older. There's depictions of violence and abuse, and Allison leaves him, making herself homeless. She travels to Bude (always fun reading a book set in the town near me!) and stumbles upon Marla, an elderly woman with dementia who thinks she's her friend, Toffee. Allison assumes the identity of Toffee in order so she can stay at Marla's house, and in doing so, really comes to care for Marla. Their relationship is just so, so beautiful.

But the whole time, there's this sense of a countdown--that this cannot last forever. Is Allison's dad looking for her? What about the latest of his girlfriends who suddenly left, even though she and Allison were a united front? And what happens when Marla gets too unwell to still be living in her own home? Allison/Toffee can't look after her forever. I won't spoil the ending--but I will say it works. It's satisfying, and it draws everything together.

The other character who has a lot of page-time is Lucy, a girl whom befriends Allison. While their friendship seems innocent at first, it soon becomes clear Lucy is using Allison. She pays her to do her homework, she invites friends over to Marla's house and doesn't respect Allison when she asks them not to break or steal anything. And I thought this inclusion of a one-sided friendship really adds to the many different ways that Crossan explores the toxic nature of man, because there are a lot of depiction of this and unkindness. Allison's dad is the main example, but Lucy parallels him on a smaller level, and then you've also got Marla's son who shows up and is revealed to only be concerned about himself and not really care for his mother. 

But all of this is offset by the tender friendship that Allison and Marla form, albeit Marla never really knows who Allison is. 

There's a lot of sadness in this book, a lot of heartbreak and pain, and I've come to understand that I love sad books. These are the books that just 'get me'. And I love novels-in-verse, and every now and again, I read one that I find so inspiring and that encourages me to work more on my own novels-in-verse. This was just that book. It was so good it was motivating.

The language is just stunningly beautiful. I wanted to fold myself up within these pages and never leave the book.



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Review: TINY PRETTY THINGS by Sona Charaipotra and Dhonielle Clayton

 

Tiny Pretty Things by Sona Charaipotra
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Now a Netflix TV show!

Black Swan meets Pretty Little Liars in this soapy, drama-packed novel featuring diverse characters who will do anything to be the prima at their elite ballet school.

From the New York Times-bestselling author of The Belles, Dhonielle Clayton, and the author of the highly anticipated Symptoms of a Heartbreak, Sona Charaipotra.

Gigi, Bette, and June, three top students at an exclusive Manhattan ballet school, have seen their fair share of drama. Free-spirited new girl Gigi just wants to dance—but the very act might kill her. Privileged New Yorker Bette's desire to escape the shadow of her ballet-star sister brings out a dangerous edge in her. And perfectionist June needs to land a lead role this year or her controlling mother will put an end to her dancing dreams forever.

When every dancer is both friend and foe, the girls will sacrifice, manipulate, and backstab to be the best of the best.

Don’t miss the gossip, lies, and scandal that continues in Tiny Pretty Things’ gripping sequel, Shiny Broken Pieces!

----

I read this book after having seen the Netflix series--albeit I'd bought the book before the TV series came out--and there's something really addictive about it. Usually, I end up liking either the book or the adaptation more--but it wasn't the case with this. I think I liked them both equally, even though they're quite different in terms of plot and character.

I couldn't stop reading this book, and it was one of those that I really wanted to savour. For a start, it's about ballet dancers and I don't know why, but I just can't get enough of ballet fiction at the moment. There's something so enticing about it.

Tiny Pretty Things is a dark book, and though it's about petty teen drama at a lot times, it also covers quite a lot of difficult themes: eating disorders, mental illness, bullying, assault, violence. And all of these things are covered so expertly and sensitivity. And I did I mention it's got perhaps the most diverse cast I've ever read? Of it's three narrators, Gigi is Black and June is Korean. Oh and Gigi has a chronic illness too. And I just loved that rep, as a chronically ill person myself.

Going back to the three narrators, too--each narrator felt like she had equal importance in the story. It was well balanced and the structure really worked. Not to mention that the narrative voices of each POV character were different as well, so that was really amazing.

At its heart, this is a book about the toxic competitive natures of teen ballet girls and what they'll do to succeed (a theme which is taken even further in the sequel which I read straight after this and am about to review too). But here's also a fair amount of romance for two out of the three narrators, and there are some touching moments of friendship and family too.

And there are unreliable narrators! Which I LOVED.

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Review: MY DARK VANESSA by Kate Elizabeth Russell

 

My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell
My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Exploring the psychological dynamics of the relationship between a precocious yet naïve teenage girl and her magnetic and manipulative teacher, a brilliant, all-consuming read that marks the explosive debut of an extraordinary new writer.

2000. Bright, ambitious, and yearning for adulthood, fifteen-year-old Vanessa Wye becomes entangled in an affair with Jacob Strane, her magnetic and guileful forty-two-year-old English teacher.

2017. Amid the rising wave of allegations against powerful men, a reckoning is coming due. Strane has been accused of sexual abuse by a former student, who reaches out to Vanessa, and now Vanessa suddenly finds herself facing an impossible choice: remain silent, firm in the belief that her teenage self willingly engaged in this relationship, or redefine herself and the events of her past. But how can Vanessa reject her first love, the man who fundamentally transformed her and has been a persistent presence in her life? Is it possible that the man she loved as a teenager—and who professed to worship only her—may be far different from what she has always believed?

Alternating between Vanessa’s present and her past, My Dark Vanessa juxtaposes memory and trauma with the breathless excitement of a teenage girl discovering the power her own body can wield. Thought-provoking and impossible to put down, this is a masterful portrayal of troubled adolescence and its repercussions that raises vital questions about agency, consent, complicity, and victimhood. Written with the haunting intimacy of The Girls and the creeping intensity of Room, My Dark Vanessa is an era-defining novel that brilliantly captures and reflects the shifting cultural mores transforming our relationships and society itself.

-- 
Oh my goodness. This book is dark. It is intense. It's amazing. And it's such an important read.

Content warning for sexual abuse, sexual assault, child sexual abuse, and grooming.

So I listened to the audiobook of this one, and I was just overwhelmed. I think that's the best way to describe my reaction. I found it difficult to listen to--and several times I had to stop when the story just became too much. It felt too real, and the rape scenes were very graphic. It made me feel sick, and as someone who's experienced sexual violence, this book just hit too close to home several times.

But I couldn't leave the book alone for long. I always had to know what happened next. I had to know if Vanessa would realise that she had been abused, and I had to know if her abuser would pay. But I think it was the first of those reasons--needing to see if Vanessa would or could understand what had happened to her was wrong--was what really drove the story. Because for a lot of the book, the relationship she had with her teacher was romanticised. And it was romanticised a lot. It's skillfully written, because as an adult reader, I could see what it was: a predatory, abusive relationship, even though for a long time, the main character can't see this. And I think what really helped was that we get pretty much duel timelines. We see her as an adult looking back (albeit she still isn't accepting that it was wrong, still believing her relationship with the man to be different, even as he is now facing accusations of abusing other girls at the school). And because we get these different perspectives--adult Vanessa as well as teenage/child Vanessa--that's what really makes this story a masterpiece.

We see the effects of this abuse on Vanessa as an adult, even though she's still struggling to see it for what it was. We see her going to therapists and struggling to hold relationships with others, both romantic and familial. We see the effects of the abuse on her relationship with her parents, both at the time when she was a fifteen-year-old and now as an adult. But we also see the the changing attitudes toward sexual assault and child sexual abuse and grooming in the book.

As a child, Vanessa takes the blame for it all when others find out about her relationship with the teacher. The fact that the teacher actually coerced her into taking the blame, really manipulating her, set me teeth on edge as I was reading, and I felt so, so angry.

But we do see how attitudes are changing in the book--as an adult, and when others have come forward about this teaching abusing them, Vanessa is starting to accept what happened to her was abuse and we see others supporting her.

There wasn't really a sense of justice though, (spoiler ahead), as the predatory teacher takes his own life about halfway through the adult timeline of the book, which does lead to Vanessa having to deal with guilt over this as well. While I desperately wanted there to be justice, I can't deny that that wouldn't have been right for the story that the author was telling here. She was focusing on Vanessa and showing what does happen.

This book is dark, probably the darkest thing I've ever read. It's disturbing. There's no denying it. I think that's why I wouldn't necessarily say I 'enjoyed' this book. It was emotionally draining. But it was so, so good. Really well written. And it's an important book that needs to be read.

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Review: OFF THE RECORD by Camryn Garrett

 

Off the Record by Camryn Garrett
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

The behind-the-scenes access of Almost Famous meets the searing revelations of #metoo in this story of a teen journalist who uncovers the scandal of the decade.

Ever since seventeen-year-old Josie Wright can remember, writing has been her identity, the thing that grounds her when everything else is a garbage fire. So when she wins a contest to write a celebrity profile for Deep Focus magazine, she’s equal parts excited and scared, but also ready. She’s got this.

Soon Josie is jetting off on a multi-city tour, rubbing elbows with sparkly celebrities, frenetic handlers, stone-faced producers, and eccentric stylists. She even finds herself catching feelings for the subject of her profile, dazzling young newcomer Marius Canet. Josie’s world is expanding so rapidly, she doesn’t know whether she’s flying or falling. But when a young actress lets her in on a terrible secret, the answer is clear: she’s in over her head.

One woman’s account leads to another and another. Josie wants to expose the man responsible, but she’s reluctant to speak up, unsure if this is her story to tell. What if she lets down the women who have entrusted her with their stories? What if this ends her writing career before it even begins? There are so many reasons not to go ahead, but if Josie doesn’t step up, who will?

From the author of Full Disclosure, this is a moving testament to the #MeToo movement, and all the ways women stand up for each other. 

--- 

Oh my goodness. How have I not reviewed this book sooner?

I read it a couple of months ago, and, just wow. This book is amazing. It's got the most realistic depiction of anxiety that I've ever seen. And I loved how Josie, the main character, doesn't have friends. She's got her sisters, and though she wishes she has close friends, we see realism reflected here. It is so good.

In the wake of #MeToo movement, this book is so, so important. Writing is the most important thing in Josie's life, and she not only wins a competition to write for a top magazine, but she also uses her writing to expose a predator and the awful behaviour and actions (sexual assaults) that a lot of young women and men experience in the film industry. This book just feels so, so important, and I almost got nervous reading it.

There's also romance that feels really wholesome and genuine, and I loved how Josie made mistakes in this. She wasn't perfect and a lot of the time she let her beliefs blind her to other things. (Oh and there's bisexual rep too!) 

Sisterhood is very important in this novel. Josie has her sisters and we really see the strength of their bond. We see it on the page, and this was just amazing. 

And there are also so many things in this book too that it tackles: racism, body image, sexuality, mental illness, art vs creator.    

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Review: CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT by Brigid Kemmerer

 

Call It What You Want by Brigid Kemmerer
My rating: 5 of 5 stars


When his dad is caught embezzling funds from half the town, Rob goes from popular lacrosse player to social pariah. Even worse, his father’s failed suicide attempt leaves Rob and his mother responsible for his care.

Everyone thinks of Maegan as a typical overachiever, but she has a secret of her own after the pressure got to her last year. And when her sister comes home from college pregnant, keeping it from her parents might be more than she can handle.

When Rob and Maegan are paired together for a calculus project, they’re both reluctant to let anyone through the walls they’ve built. But when Maegan learns of Rob’s plan to fix the damage caused by his father, it could ruin more than their fragile new friendship...

This captivating, heartfelt novel asks the question: Is it okay to do something wrong for the right reasons? 

-- 

I have to admit it: this is, for sure, one of my top reads of 2021.

My friends have been trying to get me to read Brigid Kemmerer's dystopian fantasy trilogy for ages, and I don't know why I haven't read that (still), but I ended up buying this book at Waterstones and didn't realise for a while it was the same author.

And, the moment I started this book, I was hooked.

The writing is amazing. Beautiful. It really is.

But more than that: the characters are just so real. Maegan and Rob are both so fully fleshed and fully realised--they're both so believable, and I felt like I knew them, perhaps more than I have in reading any other YA romance.

But then this didn't really feel like a romance--and I suppose it's more of a contemporary story, first and foremost. Although we can see the two central characters are falling in love (and this is just so satisfying and had me rooting for them), we get to know them as people first, and, crucially, we get to see them hurting.

Both characters are somewhat loners at the start. Maegan's avoided by most of her year group, having cheated on a test previously that meant the whole year had to retake. She's not liked, despite her being a very likeable and relatable character. Maegan's also got a secret: her older sister is pregnant by a married man. And her family don't want anyone knowing of the sister's pregnancy.

Rob is a troubled teenage boy whose dad stole a lot of money from almost everyone he knows. Rob, despite not being involved in the fraud, has been dropped from the popular group at school and is still paying for his father's actions, the following year. It's also quite heartbreaking as Rob's father tried to kill himself when the fraud was discovered and is now somewhat 'brain dead' due to this and we see Rob as a teenage carer too.

We see Rob and Maegan as they go through an array of emotions--loss and hurt and self-hatred--and we see how they come together and help each other. We see them falling in love. And we also see other themes explored through the secondary characters. The pressures on male mental health and toxic masculinity are also well examined in this book, particularly via Rob's former best mate, and that's done in a really deep and engaging way. This book really is eye-opening. It teaches you a lot without being preachy. It shows that you never know what others are going through.

But it's also exciting--there are twists and turns that really shake things up as secrets are revealed. And there's a pretty big reveal about the fraud case that Rob's parents were involved in. That had me speechless.

I can't urge you all enough to read it--because I feel everyone should.




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Review: THE HOUSE ON MANGO STREET by Sandra Cisneros

 

The House on Mango Street by Sandra Cisneros
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Acclaimed by critics, beloved by readers of all ages, taught everywhere from inner-city grade schools to universities across the country, and translated all over the world, The House on Mango Street is the remarkable story of Esperanza Cordero.

Told in a series of vignettes – sometimes heartbreaking, sometimes deeply joyous–it is the story of a young Latina girl growing up in Chicago, inventing for herself who and what she will become. Few other books in our time have touched so many readers.

-- 

I came across this book as part of my MA degree in Creative Writing, examining spiral narratives in fiction, and I ended up using this book as inspiration for my spiralling narrative poem.

Cisneros tells the story of Esperanza, a young Latina girl, as she grows up, using a series of vignettes as the structure. As I was reading this with the structure in mind, I was particularly aware of the patterns and how the vignettes were structured. Every time the story started to reach out, covering more ground, it then shrank back again, focusing on Em once more, before the story starts reaching out again.

This book covers a lot of topics as it examines how different people live, and there is a content warning for sexual assault. But, more than that, it's a book about life. As a white reader, I felt my eyes were opened a lot.

This is a extremely well written book. The craft is simply beautiful. Several times, I found myself re-reading pages simply because of the language. It's just amazing. So heartfelt and raw and poignant.

Everyone should read this book.

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