Review: ONE TRUE LOVES by Taylor Jenkins Reid

 

One True Loves by Taylor Jenkins Reid
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

In her twenties, Emma Blair marries her high school sweetheart, Jesse. They build a life for themselves, far away from the expectations of their parents and the people of their hometown in Massachusetts. They travel the world together, living life to the fullest and seizing every opportunity for adventure.

On their first wedding anniversary, Jesse is on a helicopter over the Pacific when it goes missing. Just like that, Jesse is gone forever.

Emma quits her job and moves home in an effort to put her life back together. Years later, now in her thirties, Emma runs into an old friend, Sam, and finds herself falling in love again. When Emma and Sam get engaged, it feels like Emma’s second chance at happiness.

That is, until Jesse is found. He’s alive, and he’s been trying all these years to come home to her. With a husband and a fiancé, Emma has to now figure out who she is and what she wants, while trying to protect the ones she loves.

Who is her one true love? What does it mean to love truly?

Emma knows she has to listen to her heart. She’s just not sure what it’s saying.

—-

This is the second Taylor Jenkins Reid book I’ve read, and she’s now a firm favourite author. I absolutely loved her Malibu Rising and this book was even better. I connected to the first person narration so easily, and this is exactly the kind of love story I adore. It’s a story with heart. It’s a story that has the perfect setup and the plot is about learning which choice Emma will make.

This is a story that’s heartbreaking and gut-wrenching, but every choice Emma makes does make sense. I was particularly impressed with how both Jesse and Sam felt like real love interests—they both could be ‘the one’. I found myself rooting for each of them just as much, which meant I shared Emma’s exact dilemma.

I loved how the novel started with the day that Jesse returned, and then we go back in time to see how teenage Emma met and fell in love (in different ways) with both the love interests, Jesse and Sam. We see her travel into adulthood, and there’s so much character growth in this book.

This book is light on the sex, which I really appreciated, instead being much more emotion-based. This has to be one of my favourite reads of 2022.

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Review: EVERY VARIABLE OF US by Charles A. Bush

 

Every Variable of Us by Charles A. Bush
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

After Philly teenager Alexis Duncan is injured in a gang shooting, her dreams of a college scholarship and pro basketball career vanish in an instant. To avoid becoming another Black teen trapped in her poverty-stricken neighborhood, she shifts her focus to the school's STEM team, a group of nerds seeking their own college scholarships. Academics have never been her thing, but Alexis is freshly motivated by Aamani Chakrabarti, the new Indian student who becomes her mentor (and crush?). Alexis begins to see herself as so much more than an athlete. But just as her future starts to reform, Alexis’s own doubts and old loyalties pull her back into harm’s way.

— 

This book and these characters are going to stay with me for a long, long time. After reading Every Variable of Us, Charles A. Bush is now an auto-buy author for me.

This story is so many things: it’s about loss and grief, it’s about abuse and survival, it’s about resilience and adapting to not-so-great circumstances. It’s about gangs and relationships. It’s about fears of what the future holds. It’s about family and the people we hold dear. And it says a lot about race too.

Lex is a seventeen-year-old Black girl who’s caught up in a drive by shooting and shot, ending her basketball career. She’s angry and desperate, and so flawed—but understandable and relatable. Her friends are mostly in the ‘gang culture’ and she thought basketball was her way out of the town. After the shooting, she feels she has nothing. Until new student Aamani introduces her to the STEM team and Lex becomes the final After Philly teenager Alexis Duncan is injured in a gang shooting, her dreams of a college scholarship and pro basketball career vanish in an instant. To avoid becoming another Black teen trapped in her poverty-stricken neighborhood, she shifts her focus to the school's STEM team, a group of nerds seeking their own college scholarships. Academics have never been her thing, but Alexis is freshly motivated by Aamani Chakrabarti, the new Indian student who becomes her mentor (and crush?). Alexis begins to see herself as so much more than an athlete. But just as her future starts to reform, Alexis’s own doubts and old loyalties pull her back into harm’s way member of the team, meaning they qualify for competitions.

The character arc for Lex is phenomenal. She goes from looking down on ‘nerds’ to wanting to study and really cares for her STEM teammates. She goes from nearly failing school to improving her GPA by two points, and she finds her own family among new friends. She struggles to navigate her new life as disabled and the effects this has on her career, future, and self-esteem. She wrestles with her sexuality, afraid of being Black and queer, but eventually choosing to embrace her feelings for Aaamani. She examines how much of her fears and beliefs about not being straight are rooted in ideology and her need to minimise the target on her.

Representation in this book is phenomenal. We’ve got Black characters, Asian characters, disabled characters, and neurodivergent characters. We examine white privilege and straight privilege, and we also look at drug addiction and poverty.

Lex’s mother is an addict and her mother’s boyfriend is abusive. Lex has been in multiple foster homes, at least one of which was also abusive. She’s beaten in this book and moves to a ‘crackhouse’ for safety—but she finds people who care for her and are in a position to look after at the end.

Because Lex undergoes such a strong character transformation, there’s very much her old life vs her new. Her former best friend Britt is deeply embedded in the old life—stealing, dealing drugs, living in an abusive foster home, trying to outwit other gangs—and we see her trying to pull Lex back into this life. These moments really are agonising to read. I was begging Lex to not go back to that, to stay with the STEM team, but of course, she didn’t. It was heartbreaking. And especially when Britt is then killed. I did not see that coming, but really I should have because it was inevitable.

And when Britt is murdered, Lex feels she has no choice but to avenge her—something that Aamani gets roped into when trying to stop her. I could not read fast enough here. So powerful and heartbreaking.

Aamani herself is also a great character. She’s Hindu and experiences racism, especially when other characters think she’s Muslim. In the story, she comes out as lesbian first to Lex and then to her parents—and her parents don’t accept it at all. We see Aamani struggling with this and the marriage her parents arrange for her, all the while trying to be Lex’s STEM tutor.

Matthew is on the STEM team and he’s Autistic. There’s an Author’s Note at the start of this book about this representation, emphasising it’s not own-voices autism rep. I loved Matthew’s character and Lex’s friendship with him, but I have seen a few autistic reviewers saying his character is a little stereotypical in places.

Lindsay is also another STEM team member, and Lex doesn’t get on with her at all at first, viewing her as a privileged white girl. Lindsay does seem cold and quite against Lex most of the time, but when we see her family it makes sense. She lives with parents who verbally (and maybe physically?) abuse each other. They have little money and live in a very dangerous neighbourhood. Lindsay is worn out and emotionally exhausted. Her collected, cold persona at school is a facade, and Lex acknowledges that she’s impressed that Lindsay has survived where she’s living.

And the love story. It’s a slow-build f/f between Lex and Aamani, and it challenges a lot of Lex’s misconceptions and her own stereotypes. Lex comes out as bisexual toward the end, as her relationship with Aamani has given her the courage to do this.

There is just so much packed into this story, and I wasn’t expecting it.

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Review: BRUISED by Tanya Boteju

 

Bruised by Tanya Boteju
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

To Daya Wijesinghe, a bruise is a mixture of comfort and control. Since her parents died in an accident she survived, bruises have become a way to keep her pain on the surface of her skin so she doesn’t need to deal with the ache deep in her heart.

So when chance and circumstances bring her to a roller derby bout, Daya is hooked. Yes, the rules are confusing and the sport seems to require the kind of teamwork and human interaction Daya generally avoids. But the opportunities to bruise are countless, and Daya realizes that if she’s going to keep her emotional pain at bay, she’ll need all the opportunities she can get.

The deeper Daya immerses herself into the world of roller derby, though, the more she realizes it’s not the simple physical pain-fest she was hoping for. Her rough-and-tumble teammates and their fans push her limits in ways she never imagined, bringing  Daya to big truths about love, loss, strength, and healing.

— 

This is the first book I’ve read that acknowledges one of he ‘less common’ forms of self-harm: bruising. I’ve recently come to realise that I like YA books that are about pain and hurt and despair. And for that reason, I picked up this book as soon as I heard of it. Bonus: it’s about roller derby. I LOVE skating. Right away, I knew I’d love this book and I wasn’t wrong.

But I actually loved it even more than I expected to. We’ve got an f/f relationship (I loved Shanti as soon as I met her!) and nearly every character is queer and of colour.

Daya Wijesinghe is grieving her parents’ deaths after she was the sole survivor of a car accident. She blames herself, thinking she caused it by being ‘too soft’ (her parents were arguing about her losing a boxing match when the accident occurred). Thus we have 18 year old Daya who’s trying to prove she’s “hard” and “strong” and who despises anything she perceives as weakness. She won’t talk to her friends about her feelings, she won’t hug anyone, and she won’t connect to her uncle and aunt who she now lives with it. There is just so much anger inside Daya, and she is drawn to roller derby because it’s a contact sport where she can bruise herself more and more. She can slam into others. She can hurt and be hurt. She can feel pain.

And then there is Shanti and her sister Kat. Both are troubled girls, but they cope in different ways. Shanti is ‘soft’ and connected to her emotions. Kat is ‘hard’ and puts up walls around herself. Kat is the leader of the roller derby team that Daya auditions for, and there’s a weird attraction triangle and jealousy between the two sisters.

While nearly all the characters are queer, with the exception of the older lesbian couple (who are great!), none of them are really labelled as being LGBTQIA+. They just are.

This book is full of strong characters, and it’s a book that examines team sports, rivalry, pain, hurt, healing, self-hatred, self-harm, guilt, grief, and death. Highly recommended.

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